A Freedom Village independent resident shares why she chose to move to a Continuing Care Retirement Community (CCRC) from a 55 plus retirement community (Laguna Woods), Three months later she was blessed with a quick rehab recovery at Freedom Village Skilled Nursing Care after breaking her hip. Author Diane Masson shares a tip from her book, “Your Senior Housing Options.”
Answers for seniors, adult children and family members in “Your Senior Housing Options,”authored by Diane Masson. It’s available on Amazon.com.
Learn when is the right time to move and 5 Tips on how to explore senior housing options. Shout out to Ron Greenwald and Patti Gerke for providing educational resources for seniors and their adult children.
Learn everything you need to know in “Your Senior Housing Options,”authored by Diane Masson. It’s available on Amazon.com.
Do you know a friend, family member or a senior neighbor who is struggling in their home? Have the day-to-day basics become too much? This video shares some tips on discovering the right time to start exploring senior housing.
Diane provides encouragement to plan ahead and instruction on how to navigate retirement living options. Her personal trials and breadth of experience in the field allows her to identify pitfalls to watch out for and questions to ask. I found this a very readable book that is extremely helpful for retirees and their loved ones with the desire to chart the course for retirement living success.
“Your Senior Housing Options,” is designed to help seniors and their boomer children to navigate choices quickly in crisis mode or preferably while planning ahead. Learn more tips at: Tips2Seniors.com
Learn the reasons why a 73 year old senior would plan ahead. After living in a 55-plus retirement community for 15 years and watching neighbors struggle as they age, she and her husband wanted to live in a supportive environment that offers future health care.
Have you felt like a number instead of a person at your HMO or heath provider? What happened? Frustration? What about vulnerable seniors who may or may not have an advocate at their doctor and hospital appointments? If sane adults can’t advocate for themselves, how can a senior with dementia?
A few weeks ago, I went to my HMO (Kaiser) for a simple endoscopy procedure. It was a 5-minute procedure that required me to be under anesthesia in a twilight state. Anesthesia has not always been my friend. So I came armed with all my previous anesthesia experiences (the good and the bad). The doctor was informed of my concern through the nurse. The doctor acknowledged my concern (relief on my part) and said she would give me the same twilight anesthesia as a recent colonoscopy. I agreed to this, because it had been a good anesthesia experience for me.
Well, I awoke after the procedure to a nightmare of nausea and another bad anesthesia experience. A week later, my husband compared the anesthesia of the colonoscopy with the anesthesia of the endoscopy. Low and behold, they had given me 25 extra milligrams of Demerol for my endoscopy. That was not what I agreed to with my doctor. Why would they give me more than necessary? Was it because I was on a conveyor belt of medical procedures for that day? When I shared this experience with others, a couple of friends shared more stories.
A coworker was given anesthesia during a colonoscopy and felt them begin the procedure. The medical team jumped when she said that she was still awake. Then they gave her so much anesthesia that it took her three weeks to recover.
Another friend was given 50 mg of a steroid, when it should have been a 10 mg dose. The doctor continued to overdose my friend for three months. My friend is still feeling the affects of being overmedicated. It was determined my friend never needed the steroid in the first place but they have to slowly wean him off the steroid. It takes months to do this.
My own mother-in-law was given psychotropic medications in the emergency room. Amy had to lie on a gurney for three days because there was no room for her in the psych ward. She has still not recovered from what they did to her. Psychotropic medications do not mix well with dementia.
My mom with dementia went to the hospital for abdominal pain. They wanted to do an exploratory surgery. We (my family) said no to the surgery because our mom has dementia. The doctor understood, because my mom could lose more of her memory going under anesthesia. He did not convey our wishes (no exploratory surgery) to his team. When I went to visit my mom at lunchtime, she was not in her room. It turned out they were prepping her for surgery. My husband and I raced to that floor of the hospital to stop them. We got there in the nick of time. The doctor profusely apologized. Really?? The POA says no surgery and the HMO is going to do it anyway? Ridiculous! It turned out she had a urinary track infection and lived another five years.
How do we protect ourselves? How can caregivers protect and advocate for seniors?
Diane Masson has worked in senior housing for 18 years and is the regional marketing director for two debt-free Continuing Care Retirement Communities in Southern CA (Freedom Village in Lake Forest and The Village in Hemet). Her first book “Senior Housing Marketing – How to Increase Your Occupancy and Stay Full,” is being utilized by senior housing professionals across the country. Her new book is an all-encompassing answer guide for seniors called, “Your Senior Housing Options,” designed to help seniors navigate choices quickly. Learn more tips at: Tips2Seniors.com
This can be a controversial and personal question. Many people say that you should not lie. My husband was one of those people who believed it was wrong to lie to anyone, even my mom with dementia.
After my sister died my mother, with severe short-term memory loss (dementia), inquired about her daughter Shannon. My honest husband told her that she had died. Her reaction would be like any mother learning this terrible news. A week later, my mom asked my husband about my sister, Shannon, again. Before I could respond, I had to witness my mother’s intense pain of learning that her daughter died for the second time.
Every time she asked the question about my sister and got the answer that she died, it was like the first time that she ever heard about it. She couldn’t grasp her daughter’s death in her long-term memory. What a blessing? Right? Wrong!! It is so hard to lose a sister and not share that loss with your own mom. She just was not mentally capable.
It was time to train my husband how to handle the sister question, so he could be prepared. Next time my mom asked where Shannon was today, he would say that we had not seen her in some time, but we think she is doing great (in heaven of course). My mom was satisfied with that and let it go.
What about a spouse passing? This one is tough if the senior husband and wife lived together or regularly visited his or her spouse with dementia. The loving spouse may be in the dementia person’s long-term memory.
This happened to my mother-in-law, Amy. She would ask about her husband every time we visited her. She would inquiry, “Where’s Bill?” or “Did Bill come with you?” He had not died, but was hospitalized after a heart attack. It was so hard on her that her husband of 65 years was suddenly gone.
These senior spouses (my in-laws) never lived together again. Within a few months my father-in-law was put on hospice. Amy lived in a licensed assisted living community. Sadly they were two hours apart. She always asked about him.
It was heart breaking to witness their last visit as husband and wife. They just held hands and looked at each other. A month later my father-in-law had passed away.
I taught the family not to share his death. Amy could not handle it. It would have been too confusing for her because of her dementia. At the time the psychotropic medication combined with the dementia allowed very little clarity in her brain.
What are your thoughts on this conversation? Would you tell a dementia person over and over that someone died? Would you tell them once?
Diane Masson has worked in senior housing for 18 years and is the regional marketing director for two debt-free Continuing Care Retirement Communities in Southern CA (Freedom Village in Lake Forest and The Village in Hemet). Her first book “Senior Housing Marketing – How to Increase Your Occupancy and Stay Full,” is being utilized by senior housing professionals across the country. Her new book is an all-encompassing answer guide for seniors called, “Your Senior Housing Options,” designed to help seniors navigate choices quickly. Learn more tips at: Tips2Seniors.com
