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Join in on the conversation about Senior Housing and the Silver Tsunami with Diane Masson, a senior housing expert for over 16 years. Throughout this site you will find priceless information for both professionals working in the senior housing industry… and for seniors who are seeking the inside secrets to the best options for housing available today!

 

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The Latest Senior Housing News...

Diane Masson's Tips & Articles

Can Mom Progress from Stage 2 Dementia to Stage 4 Dementia in Weeks?

Professionals have told me that a trauma could have caused Amy’s dementia (my favorite mother-in-law) to escalate rapidly. Is this true? Can all the dementia professionals and family members weigh in with their experiences? My mother-in-law’s dementia was progressing slowly like my mom’s vascular dementia. There are four stages of memory loss and Amy was in stage 2, before the trauma. She repeated herself a lot, needed cueing for personal hygiene, medication management and had little desire to leave the home. Amy talked about not being able to remember stuff, but she could still read the paper, dress, bathe, toilet and feed herself. Then Bill, my favorite father-in-law and Amy’s 24-7 caretaker, had a heart attack and went to the hospital. Amy could not understand where her rock and husband of 65 years had gone. She ended up having a psychotic break and eloping (The police had to find her and bring her back home.). A whole series of dramas happened and she hit a nurse. Then she too was hospitalized and put on psychotropic medications. Amy was in the hospital for three weeks in the psych ward. By the time she got out of the hospital, the Amy I had seen months earlier was gone. The first time my husband and I saw her after the hospitalization (we live three states away) was so sad. The vivacious and sarcastic Amy was gone. It was like seeing a shell of her former self. Her lip trembled, her arm shook and she was so sleepy from the Haldol drugs. We immediately got the psychotropic medication reduced by half. It took...

Does MOVING to a Senior Living Community Feel Like a STORM?

We all have storms in our lives. Maybe the storm is a death, sickness, or major life crisis. It could even be one of Mother Nature’s storms such as hurricane, tornado or earthquake. You or a senior you know may be going through a storm at this moment. At some point the storm always ends. There is peace and calmness again. No one is the same after one of life’s storms. The length of the storm will most likely determine the amount of wisdom gained. One of my best friends is a breast cancer survivor. Now she uses the knowledge of her successful treatments and faith to help others. She can make someone elses cancer journey less scary. What a gift! As retirement counselors in senior living and housing, we can provide that gift of knowledge to a senior considering a move. A senior may feel like they are in a storm processing a major life move to your community. Being pulled toward the benefits of living in a retirement community and simultaneously being drawn back to the security of their home can create conflict for a senior. Here are a few tips: First, a retirement counselor needs to acknowledge that a senior is facing an emotional decision (the storm). The decision is to plan ahead or wait until a health care crisis. Second, if a senior chooses to wait until a health crisis they will be forcing their adult children to eventually “put them someplace” (bigger storm). Many seniors don’t realize this truth. Seniors are typically shocked to learn they will have a 66% chance of needing a...

“Your Senior Housing Options,” Channel 6 Interview with Diane Masson

“Your Senior Housing Options,” has a simplistic title, but what’s inside this new book can save you months of research time.  Hear Diane Masson’s interview of how her mother and in-law’s faced the pivotal decision to plan ahead or wait until a crisis.  Learn the pitfalls from transitioning from your home to senior housing.  Understand what questions to ask, insider tips and dirty secrets revealed.  The decision to stay home requires caregivers.  Prevent elder abuse by determining if a home care agency is reputable, before they move into your home.  You are just not looking for today’s needs, but for your future care.  Discover key differences between rental facilities vs Continuing Care Retirement Communities.  Do you have enough financial resources if you need to be in a higher level of care for an extended period of time?   Please enjoy my new interview.  For more info: Www.Tips2Seniors.com  Diane Masson is a senior housing expert, the author of two books and regional marketing director for two debt-free Continuing Care Retirement Communities in Southern CA: Freedom Village in Lake Forest and The Village in...

Un-engaged at Work? Only 30.5% are Engaged. 10 RECHARGING TIPS!

Is there a crack in your armor? Are you living on empty and have nothing left to give your family or job? Maybe you are a full-or part-time caregiver for an aging parent or a senior with dementia? Perhaps you are in a senior living sales slump? You can’t help anyone else or be productive at work unless you take care of yourself first. Look for joy in the moments. You may be going through a dire time. Maybe your parent or one of your senior patients is dying. Perhaps your daughter or son has some kind of health or school trauma. Possibly you just learned that someone scheduled to move into your retirement community has changed his or her mind. It may have been the one you needed to hit your sales goal this month. Sigh…they are going to stay home and wait for a crisis. You start asking why over and over. Don’t become jaded and harden yourself with a giant wall to protect your emotions. It’s mentally checking out and called un-engagement. Your family, senior prospective residents and coworkers can feel your wall. If you work in senior living sales, we can’t help every senior. Only the ones who choose to plan ahead. Do you feel overwhelmed with what’s happening in your personal life? Is your lack of sales getting you down? Well it’s time to go find your rainbow. Are you wondering how to get started?  Feed your mind with positive thoughts. Schedule time to heal yourself! 10 Recharging Tips: Go to a live concert, stand in your shower or drive down the road singing at the...

What do you do? What’s your 30-second commercial?

We’ve all been at a party when a new acquaintance asks, “What do you do?” What is your response? Is it engaging and interesting? Or does your heart drop, because you have to talk about work and you end up sharing a boring list of your duties or mumble your exact job title? Every one of us can improve our 30-second commercial and make it captivating to the listener. Here are a couple of tips of what not to do: No laundry list of duties Don’t just give your job title and company name At Seattle’s Pike Place Market, a company that sold fish seven days a week decided to make it interesting. They were determined to have fun and engage the customers. So the motivated employees started throwing the fish that customers were  purchasing. Now they are a huge tourist attraction and sell lots of fish. If you work for a senior living company and simply state you work at an assisted living or skilled nursing community, it sounds boring. Saying, “We improve the quality of seniors lives everyday,” – makes your acquaintance ask a secondary questions of – how? Everyone typically knows an aging parent, grandparent or senior neighbor. In the remote possibility that you do not, you probably know a friend who is dealing with an aging senior who needs help. Ninety-nine percent of the time, people need advice for an aging relative and you can end up helping them or suggest they consider your senior living community (which is wonderful for them, your company and you). Maybe you already use your 30-second commercial on a daily basis?...

Worthless Power of Attorney?

It’s hard to be an advocate for a senior for years on end. I advocated for my own mom (with vascular dementia) for over 10 years, until I recently lost her. Advocacy is not an easy job and it can entail sleepless nights of concern. It’s vital to select a Power of Attorney (POA) who currently knows you well enough. If you can no longer speak on your own behalf, your POA needs to know if you are over medicated or sedated just by looking at you. They need to know your baseline so they can help you and reverse the issue or accelerate an outcome in a timely fashion. The POA’s main purpose is to comply with your wishes that were indicated before you became incapacitated. They should always protect your best interests both mentally and physically. Over medication is a growing problem for seniors. I have heard many stories of hospitals overmedicating seniors. My own mother-in-law was over sedated in the emergency room. She has Alzheimer’s. They had no room in the psych ward and she was drug restrained for three days and two nights in the emergency room. Sigh… It has taken us four months to get my mother-in-law off Haldol. Psychotropic drugs and dementia do not mix well. Her POA thought the doctors understood what they were doing tapering off the medication. Unfortunately, my mother-in-law’s doctor admitted to knowing nothing about psychotropic drugs and was relying on others to advise her. Gulp… What a mess! We are talking about seniors’ lives… Neither the doctor nor the POA knew what to do about my mother-in-law’s medications...

New RESOURCE BOOK for SENIORS

It is important that seniors make a plan while they are healthy and well OR they will find themselves in a situation where family members have to “put them someplace.” My in-laws waited for a health care crisis that you can read about HERE and the adult children were forced to “put them” in more supportive environments. The doctor told my father-in-law that he needed 24/7 assisted living care and another doctor required that my mother-in-law with Alzheimer’s move into a secured memory care simultaneously.  How do you find a good retirement community, assisted living, memory care or skilled nursing care? “Your Senior Housing Options,” gives tips and advice on exactly what questions a senior needs to ask in order to determine if a senior living provider is great or mediocre. Almost every week I speak to 50 to 75 seniors about their future health care and housing options. Two months ago, I created a new presentation based on my book, “Your Senior Housing Options.” What an impact it has made. Seniors share how grateful they are for clear and concise information that they can apply immediately in making a decision for themselves. This is my passion and I want to help seniors make a wise choice. The book articulates the costs and consequences of the various senior living options. I share the ramifications of waiting too long and how a senior can save money and stress by planning ahead. Seniors can take away valuable tips they can utilize immediately as they begin to research and explore long-term health choices. Most seniors have no knowledge of how to select...

Irreversible Consequences of Drug Restraints in Memory Care?

Adult children just want their parent with dementia to be okay. Most do not have a clue on psychotropic (mind altering) medications or how they work. Families rely on professionals to recommend doses and medications for their senior parents. If a professional doctor or memory care community says that our mom or dad needs these medications, we tend to accept their wisdom. We are programed to not question authority. Yet when a parent is sedated in a drugged stupor over an extended period of time, more adult children are starting to ask why. At this point it can be too late for a senior with dementia. Psychotropic medications can have a lasting affect on a senior with dementia. Seniors may never be able to return to their baseline, before taking psychotropic drugs. My mother-in-law was given Haldol and now does the Haldol shuffle. It is a continuous stand up, walk, sit down and then it starts all over again. It is so sad to watch and they can’t stop. A professional told me it’s like their skin is crawling and they have to keep moving to make the feeling go away. When we recently brought my mother-in-law her favorite Greek food for lunch, she sat down in front of her favorite foods at the table and then immediately stood back up and started the Haldol shuffle again. She had no desire to eat her favorite foods. It has taken four months for the family to get her off the Haldol. My sister-in-law had to physically take my mother-in-law to her primary care physician and demand for the Haldol to...

Comatose in Memory Care (Three memory cares in four months?)

My mother-in-law who got over drugged in the hospital several months ago is now in her second memory care community in Seattle. The first high-end memory care community in downtown Seattle wanted to follow the doctor’s recommendations of sedation. It took me three days to get the drugs reduced by half after I saw my overmedicated mother-in-law. Then the second memory care community promised our family that they would get her off the reduced Haldol dose. We believed them and paid a hefty community fee (a one time move-in fee) Sigh… It’s been almost two months in the second Memory care. We had an unproductive care conference about two weeks ago. When the family talked about changing the psych drugs the conversation led to considering Amy as a candidate for hospice because she was not eating. What? It turns out one of the drugs she began in the hospital was also an appetite suppressant. She was overmedicated in the hospital because there were no rooms in the psych ward, so my mother-in-law stayed in the emergency room for three days and two nights. Getting the picture of sedation now? My sister-in-law is on the warpath. She is demanding changes for her mom and talking about moving her to a third place. Will it help? The second memory care called my husband to see if they could save the move out. He simple said, “You have known that the family wanted my mom off the Haldol. How many phone calls and faxes have you made to the doctor to make that happen?” The administrator started to back pedal. My sister-in-law...

Unresolved Mom Issues at Death

Here is a painful subject that I am going to bring up. Hundreds of people have reached out to me in the last week since my mother passed. So many of them shared a story about their own mom passing. Some were wonderful experiences that they will treasure and others were not. Sudden deaths are very hard. Every personal death I have experienced in my life was sudden, except for my mom’s death. You can read about my mom’s passing experience HERE. You either had a loving caring parent or you did not. This article is for those who did not. Many vulnerable sons and daughters were abused by either their mom or dad, sometimes both. We live in world that accepts dysfunctional families now. Family abuse that was hidden in the 1950’s and 1960’s can now be accepted in the mainstream. There are resources and counseling available so abused children (who have become adults) can acknowledge the abuse and move on. My mother was abusive to all her young children. You can read my article MEAN MOM, NICE MOM and DEMENTIA HERE. A wonderful counselor changed my life for the better and his recommendation is explained in my article MEAN MOM, NICE MOM and DEMENTIA HERE. My mom and I enjoyed over 20 years of a good adult relationship. I forgave her. Many of you know I have advocated for my mom’s care needs for the past 10 years. So what happens if an abused adult son or daughter still has unresolved issues at death with mom? Do they go to the funeral? Do they have a free pass not...

Advocacy for my Mom Until Death

My mother’s blood sugar spiked to 400 on Monday and 520 on Tuesday. She was fighting a UTI and ecoli. At 92, her body tried to fight it off. The doctor said the antibiotics would either work in two days or she would go down hill fast. It was the later. The care ambassadors and nurses at Freedom Village were amazing. I lost count after twenty-three staff came in to say good-bye and provide loving care. One care ambassador said, “I’ve known your mom for two years and she was my family.” Another said, “Everyday she would greet me in the hall and compliment what I was wearing that day.” My favorite was someone reminding me of her love of cats and how she usually had one with her or would respond to the mechanical one that meowed, purred and moved. Her face would light up with joy. My mom lived in a higher level of care for nine years. Seven years in assisted living and almost two years in skilled nursing in Lake Forest, CA. Six years ago, a doctor made a comment that her life was not worth living because she had dementia and couldn’t remember anything. I replied, “How many of your patients said thank you and complimented you today?” The doctor sheepishly said, “Only your mom.” I said, “Then she still is fulfilling her purpose isn’t she?” The doctor backed off and gave the best care until my mom left that Seattle hospital. Through nine years of advocacy for my mom, I have done the best I was able, making decisions with the knowledge that...

“We Are Half Sold Out!” – Seriously?

If a senior living sales person or ANYONE said to you, “We are half sold out,” what would be your first thought? I bet, it would not create urgency for you to act now. When I was considering buying comedy tickets at the Improv last night, I inquired if the event was already sold out. The salesperson divulged, “We are half sold out. Getting tickets should be no problem. We are really surprised that only half the tickets have sold two days before the event.” I thought, oh, this comedian is not as popular as I thought. I will wait to buy my tickets. I was actually disappointed that the salesperson did not create urgency for a famous comic. It was shocking to me that she would be so forth coming and I walked away disheartened. I told her that I would come back later and did. But I decided to not buy the tickets, because apparently I could just show up in a couple of days and buy the tickets on the day of the event. Her over sharing will continue to affect sales until a manager catches it. The comedy club sales person over shared. What could she have said instead? “Gosh, let me check, I might be able to get you some tickets. It’s very unusual to have this comic coming to our location. How many tickets would you like?” I would have bought the tickets instantly. Remember that famous Beanie Baby craze of the 1980’s? It was all about urgency for stuffed toys. Yes, I am the proud owner of 100 Ty bears and still...